Archive for the ‘Raping Mother Earth’ Category.
So while waiting to put clothes in the dryer, I went out and did some errands, one of them going to Sears in search of a Mother Earth-raping battery for this camera. The politically correct, rechargeable, “green” POS lithium battery leaks power, so if I haven’t used the camera in a week, the battery’s dead.
Guess what? I can use AA batteries in it.
Seriously. Liberals have gone off the deep end. Check this out.
Do you feel anxious when you see a television set left on standby? Does the sight of a plastic bottle haphazardly tossed into a paper-only recycling bin make you feel nauseous? Are you consumed with rage when someone has left an empty room and not switched off the light?
Have you recently found yourself overcome with a desire to spit on your car-driving friends and family? When a loved one tells you that he is flying off for some winter sun, do you feel like bludgeoning him over the head with a blunt instrument until he appears no longer to be breathing?
If so, don’t worry! You are probably suffering from “carborexia”, Or “energy anorexia”. Psychiatrists in America have identified a new mental illness that threatens the very fabric of society: an obsession with saving the planet. Some people are so addicted to cutting their carbon emissions that they seem to have gone quite mad.
Take, for example, Sharon Astyk, who makes her four children sleep in a huddle so she doesn’t have to turn on the heating (if she was that concerned about the planet, perhaps she could have stopped reproducing after baby number two).
Or Jay Matsueda, who waters his lawn with his own urine so that he doesn’t have to flush the loo; he says that it was his ex-girlfriend’s choice of gas-guzzling car, rather than his habit of weeing on the grass, that led to the break-down of their relationship.
“If you’re criticising friends because they’re not living up to your standards of green, that’s a problem,” said Elizabeth Carll, a psychologist who specialises in obsessive compulsive disorder.
It’s popped up in Oz, too.
PSYCHIATRISTS have detected the first case of “climate change delusion” - and they haven’t even yet got to Kevin Rudd and his global warming guru.
Writing in the Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry, Joshua Wolf and Robert Salo of our Royal Children’s Hospital say this delusion was a “previously unreported phenomenon”.
“A 17-year-old man was referred to the inpatient psychiatric unit at Royal Children’s Hospital Melbourne with an eight-month history of depressed mood . . . He also . . . had visions of apocalyptic events.”
(So have Alarmist of the Year Tim Flannery, Profit of Doom Al Gore and Sir Richard Brazen, but I digress.)
“The patient had also developed the belief that, due to climate change, his own water consumption could lead within days to the deaths of millions of people through exhaustion of water supplies.”
Look for a whole nation of hysterical, delusional nutjobs as the public schools and Democrats continue to scare the bejesus out of kids.
to hate Apple, that is: Environmentalists Cheer on Apple for Getting Greener.
Ace.
Well, now the chickens have come home to roost. European business leaders are threatening to take their businesses somewhere else where the environmental restrictions are not so damaging. They claim that the new carbon emissions offset programs amount to a “tax” (which they are, the EU just didn’t want to call it that) and that the restrictions will cost “44 billion” a year in the next seven years.
Surprised, anyone?
Idiots.
Another “scientific” Chicken Littlism bites the dust. More, including links to pics, here.
Check out the latest doom and gloom dire warning about Mother Earth:
Flat TVs a ‘Climate Time Bomb’
Sleek and skinny, new televisions may have a greater effect on climate change than massive coal plants, scientists warn
And we just got one!
Even Salon hates Planet Green:
Concern for the environment is, among other things, an upper-middle-class privilege and a status marker. Planet Green turns the entire Earth into a lifestyle accessory, often to uniquely awful effect.
The most inane program in Planet Green’s initial lineup is, by a nose, Alter Eco, which, depressingly, finds Adrien Grenier behaving very much as he does in the role of Vincent Chase on Entourage. Verily, the show is promoted as a virtual hangout with Grenier’s “entourage of green activists, experts, and friends,” and it feels designed to provide you with lines to pick up chicks at the farmers market.
In one episode, Grenier chills with a dude—obviously a douche bag, just a biodegradable one—who is constructing an eco-friendly pleasure dome in the hills of Los Angeles, a Playboy Mansion with organic bunny feed. We’re told that the water from the showers will be treated and reused to water the garden, and also that the shower in the master bath will be spacious enough to accommodate 19 honeys. Elsewhere, some of the crew goes to an organic wine tasting, where they swill in a most obnoxious fashion. There are “great little tips” for exercising greenly, such as doing pull-ups on the limb of a tree. People seeking material gain are exhorted to “make that cheddar.” It’s impossible to say whether the show’s smug superiority is more grating than its anorexic thinness of content, but seeing them in combination may fill you with a kind of retributive rage. I for one want to go out and kill a dolphin.
I can’t believe this guy actually watched it. Just the ads are enough to make me throw things at the television.
Electric cars kill polar bears!
When it comes to fighting global warming, Honda has rolled out the worst car on the planet: the new Clarity.
This is the first auto that runs on fuel cells ever offered to consumers. As Honda’s site explains,
Fuel cells produce electricity that can be used as a clean alternative to gasoline. The fuel cell stack in the FCX Clarity converts hydrogen(H2) and oxygen (O2) into electricity. Learn more about How Fuel Cells Work.
As Honda’s TV ads point out, the only exhaust from the Clarity is water vapor. The Clarity is obviously designed to capture the market of car buyers who think that gasoline engines are bad things for the environment because they emit carbon dioxide. So the Clarity, emitting only simple water vapor, must be magnitudes better at rolling back global warming, yes?
Problem is, when it comes to global warming, water vapor is enemy number one: “Water vapor constitutes Earth’s most significant greenhouse gas, accounting for about 95% of Earth’s greenhouse effect.”
So buy a Clarity and kill the polar bears!
Well, it’s not like I was thinking about buying a wind-up toy car — and I don’t buy Japanese cars, anyway. I like my V8 Explorer.
Would somebody explain why it’s taken this dolt this long to figure it out?
The Government’s former chief scientific adviser has accused green activists of putting the fight against climate change at risk by wanting to take society back to the 17th century.
Sir David King, who is credited with convincing Tony Blair of the urgency of global warming, told the Guardian newspaper that tackling the problem without using technological solutions - including nuclear power - was hopeless.
He said: “There is a suspicion, and I have that suspicion myself, that a large number of people who label themselves ‘green’ are actually keen to take us back to the 18th or even the 17th century.â€
Well, duh. This has been obvious since the first Earth Day. I guess this moron is slow on the uptake. Hat tip: Tim Blair.
Free carbon offsets! I’m going to print the certificate and frame it — maybe make a copy and turn it into a bumpersticker!
Hat tip: Van Helsing.
On the heels of yesterday’s Mark Steyn zinger:
It’s fascinating to observe how almost any old totalitarian racket becomes respectable once it’s cloaked in enviro-hooey. For example, restrictions on freedom of movement were previously the mark of the Soviet Union et al. But in Britain, they’re proposing limits on your right to take airline flights to other countries - and, as it’s in the name of environmental responsibility, everyone thinks it’s a grand idea.
comes this, the Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division, keeping us safe from evil chemicals!
Another “scientific” Chicken Littlism bites the dust. More, including links to pics, here.
In the same story, we have the facts:
Four people have been arrested on arson suspicion so far and $US150,000 reward is offered for any information leading to further arrests.
And the “narrative”:
the fires currently devastating California are the latest sign of how climate change is affecting humanity
So did “climate change” somehow cause the arsonists to set the fires? Did the journalists not pay close enough attention to notice? Or are they just morons?
You decide.
Hat tip: Tim Blair.
The number of heat-related deaths in and around New York City will nearly double by 2050 - and could rise as high as 95 percent — due to global warming, if no efforts are made to reduce greenhouse gas emissions, a new study shows.
No such luck. Oh. Was that insensitive?
Tim Blair pays homage to The Prophet Al-Gore (PBUH). Steyn kneels in hoomageTM to the Goracle, while Professor Furedi invokes the Holy Sacrament of Powerpoint.
Our Prophet who art in a jet plane,
Hallowed be thy gut!
Thy presidency come!
Thy will be done!
In Jesusland as it is in Manhattan!
Give us this day our daily carbon credit,
And forgive us our showers,
as we forgive those who forgo them.
Lead us into higher taxation,
and deliver us from civilization!
Last weekend, we enhugened our carbon footprint by resurrecting that American tradition, the Sunday drive. We drove to the west side of the county and saw Philpsburg (for the first time). There’s supposed to be a 73-foot Santa somewhere there, but we couldn’t find it. How do you hide a 73-foot Santa?
We saw lots of election yard signs. Sheriff Nau’s outnumbered Kalmbach’s by at least 10:1.
Today, we made another contribution to greenhouse gasses. After running errands here in the V8 Explorer, we went to Zion, past Bellefonte. Again, lots of yard signs, even more, since last weekend, we were mostly in the country. Again, there were at least ten Nau signs to every Kalmbach sign. What was really striking, however, was how many houses and businesses had all Republican yard signs and a Denny Nau sign. Not a handful. Not a few. Not some. A whole bunch.
It doesn’t look to me like Denny has anything to worry about. Here, by the way, is his picture. The Stetson cracks me up — this is Pennsylvania, after all.
The plumber is gone, and the water works. What was the problem? There were two, both of them failed “energy saving” technology. The pressure reduction valve failed, so he took it out. The other problem was the little snorkel balls in the water heater. They put them in these days to keep heat from escaping up the water lines. Yeah, well, they get stuck, and no water. He took those out, too. So that immensifies the carbon footprint. Or is it a water footprint.
Now, the water pressure is higher than it ever was. Maybe greenpeace will picket the house.
The plumber’s been here all morning. Still here, but it looks like solution is within sight — and it increases our carbon footprint!
Hysteria over ice melt at one end of the world, but near-silence at the ice increase at the other. Almost like someone was trying to fool you, or something.
Brown people cause global warming!
Yesterday or the day before, we found out that (oh no!) walking is worse for global warming climate change than driving your SUV (oh dear! walking makes The Earth Goddess cry! oh dear!). Today, we find that organic food also makes Mother Gaia sad!
Save the Earth! Drive SUVs and eat more meat!
Bitter points to this little gem from that modern-day Einstein, Paris Hilton:
Paris Hilton told Larry King that, postjail, she wants to do good.
First up?
“I ordered a Hummer hybrid,†she told Us on July 19.
Really?
“Such a car doesn’t exist,†a Hummer spokesman says.
Maybe she meant one of these.
And I quote:
Have you ever driven by a hippie, environmental protest and had your beautiful gas guzzling SUV keyed?
Now you can protect your car by making it appear environmentally friendly with the Glenn Beck Hydro-Carbon Powered Eco-Vehicle bumper sticker. Look like a friend of the Earth while killing it at the same time!
Hydro Carbon just means oil, but with our clever recycle-shape inspired design, environmentalists and global warming zombies alike will take one look and think you’re on their side. Only we’ll know the truth behind it…you evil conservative hate monger!
And with this sticker 2-pack you get one for your car, and one to share with a friend.
Genius.
Here’s what I want:
Saw it at the Boalsburg arts festival last weekend — and it gets 15 mpg in the city!
Actually, what I really want is an M1 Abrams.
Fully functional. And I do mean fully.
Live Earth Johannesburg Officials Blame Climate Change For Poor Turn-Out
Climate Change Derangement Syndrome!
The envirowackjobs somehow manage to outdo their own idiocy, delving for new depths of utter stupidity in search of global hysteria. Thanks to Tim Blair, I saw this Chicken Little story:
Boaters on Lake Superior said the water is so low it appears the world’s largest freshwater lake is disappearing.
The lake, which is about 18 inches below average, has dropped nearly 2.5 feet over the past decade and the entire Great Lakes Basin is seeing reduced water levels, CBS News said Friday.
Oh my God, no! Lake Superior is disappearing! Oh whatever will we do! Sign Kyoto now!
Let’s look at this in perspective, shall we? Lake Superior is the largest fresh-water lake in the world. Its surface area is 31,820 square miles, larger than many states (larger than South Carolina). The average depth is 483 feet, and the maximum depth is 1,333 feet, and during storms, waves often reach 20-30 feet.
Let’s stop there for a minute. Forget math. Just think about it for a minute. The average depth of Lake Superior is 483 feet. Would you be afraid it was drying up if the water level sank 18 inches? But let’s go on.
Lake Superior holds 2,935 cubic miles of water. Why cubic miles and not gallons? Because that’s 3,231,778,805,900,000 gallons. Three quadrillion, 231 trillion, 778 billion, 805 million and 900 thousand gallons. That’s enough water to cover every inch of North and South America with a foot of water.
Think about it. 18 inches. 3,231,778,805,900,000 gallons. Perspective.
The real joke here is that this idiotic story appeared in the “science” section. This, my friends, is the problem with majoring in the liberal arts.
Dog poop will melt the earth! We’re doomed, I tell you, doomed!
Polar bears are drowning on Neptune–and it’s George Bush’s fault!
Hat tip to Pam for this stroke of genius–carbon debits!
Carbon Debits - Increasing Your Carbon Footprint…
Making a carbon debit is a delicate matter taking both skill and time. Our carbon debiting process starts with our FECON spinning shredder and a driver who has vendetta against trees. Add any tree and about 20 seconds and a carbon debit is born!
On a Mission - Taking Away Al Gore’s Carbon Credits…
We are on a mission to take away every one of Al Gore’s meaningless carbon credits by simply providing carbon debits. Help us make this dream a reality by purchasing one of the packages below. Don’t let Al Gore assuage his guilt with meaningless penance, heap it back on with carbon debits – every one of which we will let him know about.
Do We Really Kill Trees?
The short answer is “Yes”. We run a burgeoning business of clearing trees from grasslands so the Antelope won’t be scared. As silly as that previous sentence sounds it is the truth. So, you can have a clear conscience that you removed a terror inducing tree in an effort to improve the antelope state of mind – which makes them better targets during hunting season. Although we don’t completely follow the logic of the game and fish department on this, we go along with it.
Their packages range from:
Standard Carbon Debit Package ($19.95)
to the duper deluxe:
Premier Carbon Debit Vacation Package ($4999.95)
It’s almost worth the 19.95 for the T-shirt alone.
as Average Gay Joe leads the charge against sodium chloride!
Zimbabwe thought Sydney’s Earth Hour - turning off the lights for an hour to save the planet - was such a good idea, it’s turning off the power to the whole country. Every day.
Heh.
BOTTLED water, the world’s fastest growing beverage, carries a heavy environmental cost, adding plastic to landfills and putting pressure on natural springs, the author of a new US report said today.
“Bottled water is really expensive, in terms of environmental costs and economically,” said Ling Li, who wrote the report for the Washington-based Worldwatch Institute.
Bottled water is a scam, but this is about the best reason I’ve seen to buy it.
How could I have forgotten? I shopped at Sam’s Club (that kills the rainforest or something, right?) and bought beef (you know how all those cow farts are bringing about global warming).
Shop at Sam’s!
Eat more beef!
Rape Mother Earth!
I figured there must be something to this doing nothing at all with any consequences and calling it “doing what I can!” liberals are always doing, so I decided to try it for myself. The first question was what cause I could do nothing at all of consequence about, but would make me feel like I had. And the obvious one, of course, was raping Mother Earth!
The second question was just how much I was willing to do (or not do). There are limits. I’m not inclined to take a poo “in the woods hunched over like an animal,” like Drew Barrymore, though when she says, “it was awesome!” I’m quite sure she thought it was.
Once I’d “worked through” those issues, I was ready. So here’s what I did yesterday to rape Mother Earth:
So what did you do yesterday to rape Mother Earth? Are you doing your part?